I’ve watched 3 episodes of Dublin Housewives now, so I think it’s time to say a few words.  Ok, I’ve already said loads of words over on Twitter, but it’s time to say a few words here.  Despite the bizarro scheduling (how many episodes are we going to get?  Is it just going to be on for a week and then disappear for ages a la Come Dine With Me?  What’s that about?!?), I’m enjoying it, but then that’s hardly a surprise given my penchant for shite telly.  Let’s do a quick rundown of the characters:

1.  Virginia Macari:  She’s my favourite so far.  I think she’s actually relatively genuine given the situation, she’s firey which I like and I can’t help but be slightly seduced by how beautiful she is.  She’s just had a baby, and is currently obsessed with expressing milk and her new swimwear line.

2.  Jo:  Jo makes me sad because she is so sad.  She’s made her way from Ballymun to Castleknock and she has a son.  That’s the good stuff.  She seems quite sweet at the core of it but her obvious unhappiness in her marriage is tough to watch.  Also, I can’t help but mention that she could do with a friendly run-in with POD from “Snog, Marry, Avoid”; she’s a good looking woman but there’s a frightening amount of hairspray, tan and panstick going on.

3.  Roz:  Wife, mother…tumbleweed.

4.  Lisa Murphy:  I mean…how could you not love Lisa?  By her own admission, she’s been minded her whole life, whether by her family or her boyfriends, and she is essentially a whisp of candyfloss dolled up the nines 24/7.  She gets bonus points for the fact that her beauty salon is called “A New Lisa Life” and of COURSE for her accent.  It’s incredible.  The stuff of legend.  You have to hear it to believe it, or else you could trawl through the Gift Grub archives and hear what they’ve done with it.

5.  Danielle:  Danielle is a Botox practitioner with a son.  She loves her son and rugby players (as long as they don’t have a brain…no really, she said that) and hates pretty much everything else.  She will be the source of most of the conflict as she is one of those “I’M NOT A BITCH I’M JUST HONEST” bitches.  However, she is currently in my good books because tonight she uttered one of the best statements I’ve ever heard on Irish tv.

“I wouldn’t attend Michael O’Doherty’s VIP Style Awards. There are a million things i’d rather do than attend that sunburned fuckwit’s cabaret tonight.”

Amazing.  She then went on to make a very salient point about how she wouldn’t “rate a woman on the frock she’s wearing” which I liked too.  FEMINISM?  That’s the last thing we expected.  Well done Danielle.

Overall, it’s very entertaining for someone like me who occasionally likes to be entertained/made-feel-slightly-smug/not-have-to-use-my-brain-very-much while watching telly of a weeknight.  I’m looking forward to future gems from Danielle, although tonight’s will be hard to beat.